Sometimes this so-called-life of mine is just so curious to me. I am not quite sure whether I should be laughing hysterically or crying ballistically. I am extremely moody and stressed and think my hormones have turned me into a crazy 13 year old girl. Everything is overwhelming. I either burst into tears or complain/yell at the dumbest things. Exhaustion hits in at the drop of a hat. I am SO OVER IT! I don't know what to do. I feel like a failure as a wife and mother. My house is not just a mess, it's dirty...really dirty. I feel like I don't every REALLY get to play with my kids the way that I want to because I constantly find things that need to be done just to keep afloat on the laundry/grocery shopping/etc. A woman's house is a reflection of her and mine is TERRIBLE! Not only is it dirty, but so many things are broken (like the closet door that then fell over to chip our bathroom cabinet, dent the floor, and bust the drawer). Our yard is STILL not done after 6 1/2 years and only consists of a fire hazard pile of tree limbs that need to be taken care of. We have a lot of things we would LIKE to get done but don't because no matter how hard we try we find something else to do (like sleep...imagine that).
I suppose I need to take a step back and look at the amusing things that occur in my life. Unfortunately, they don't always seem amusing to me. Example:
It's 9am. I've already been up for 3 hrs because one of my
crazy beautiful children decided that they were awake and didn't want to sleep ANYmore. We have all eaten breakfast (including cheerios and bananas which now have added themselves to the "collection" found on my kitchen floor) and the boys are in the tub. After scrubbing everyone
somewhat clean I take Noah out, dry him and set him on the floor all while not taking my eyes off the tub. I grab Jonah out, turn around and start to dry him when I notice that Noah is now on his belly with something...hanging...wait...NO! It's POOP! AUGH!!! Poop on the floor...and he's moving all over! The kid rarely moves and he has decided that it is time to kick it in gear when he has poop smooshed on his tush? Seriously? So I
throw put Jonah down and turn to get the poop that is now smooshed into Noah's lil' bum the whole time thinking, "I gotta get this poop off the floor before Jonah gets the taste of "chocolate". I get a diaper on Noah and turn to get Mr Houdini himself just as Elijah yells "POOP! Mom, POOP! Jonah's got POOP!" You have GOT to be kidding me! Now, Noah is my pooper. He has pooped IN THE BATHTUB three, 3, yes, THREE times in the last two weeks. Jonah...never had a problem. Well, that changed as I ran to get the mushy, brown glob from his bottom. Of course, by this point pieces have come onto the floor and he's reaching for it as I am yelling "NOOOO!" It's slow motion and by the time I get to him I am SO INCREDIBLY thankful he doesn't have it in his hands and mouth. I clean him up, put a diaper on, and RUSH to clean the floor before more damage occurs. Enough to get me frazzled for the day, that's for sure.
Then of course there was two nights ago when Noah figured out how to pull himself into a sitting position in the middle of the night and got "stuck". He didn't know what to do and just let out a wail. He had a drippy, runny nose (when aren't my kids sick?) so I brought him to our room, sucked out his nose and nursed him thinking he'd go to bed with us easier than his crib. He tossed and turned, barely able to breath. Slept minimally and then at 430/5 decided, hey, party in Mom and Dad's bedroom. He was UP...smiles, coos, "pay attention to me". Augh! Drive me crazy. But he was stinkin' cute...just not that early.
I guess I just need to pay attention to the humor that can be found somewhere....
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